"For His Glory and Our Good"
This title to some may seem poetically profound, to me it is a reflective truth gained from many months of prayer and surrender.
For those of you who haven't heard much of our story, the following background information may surprise you, and for those of you who know our story well, you will remember the many conversations you have had with us about this very lesson.
When I met Phillip in January, I was waiting on the Lord to deliver on a promise He made me the previous April. The promise? "I want you to prepare yourself to be in a relationship a year from now". This promise was in no way from my own heart, as I was reluctant to move back to the Northwest and was disheartened that there were no single, godly men that I would be compatible with, and besides-I had been single my whole life! Despite these huge doubts I waited to see if that was really God's promise for me.
Fast forward eight months to January 20th, 2011 when I met Phillip Grant. My roommate Rachelle was convinced that he was perfect for me, and I was less than thrilled to be"set up" without a man's knowledge or my consent. However, as I took a step of faith, despite much fear, I began to get to know Phillip and quickly got involved with his ministry. In the weeks, and months that followed, I prayed more intently and specifically than ever before. The Lord asked me to trust Him, and to be Phillip's friend, which I did ever so cautiously and all the while pondering in my heart if this man could be the fulfillment of God's promise.
Those months were filled with pain of risk, and not knowing what to expect. I initiated two "define the relationship" conversations with Phillip out of a desire to know where we stood (with much trembling of voice and hands, and sometimes tears; each conversation went better than I expected, but yielded few answers to my many questions. So many times I wanted to run away from this "thing" that was happening between us. I just wanted Phillip to make a decision about our relationship, I didn't care what the decision was, as long as I just knew where we stood. My heart was starting go beyond just feelings of friendship and getting my heart broken terrified me.
However, I knew that the Lord was in control, He wasn't shutting any doors, I had prayed over and over again, "Lord if this is not Your will, if this is not the man that I am going to marry, please shut the door. I want Your will more than my own". I quickly found that these were some of the most painful prayers I had ever spoken, requiring the deepest level of trust and surrender that I had ever experienced. Little did I know, that this was just the beginning of the "birthing pains" that I would experience in our growing love.
(to be continued....)
~Casey~
This title to some may seem poetically profound, to me it is a reflective truth gained from many months of prayer and surrender.
For those of you who haven't heard much of our story, the following background information may surprise you, and for those of you who know our story well, you will remember the many conversations you have had with us about this very lesson.
When I met Phillip in January, I was waiting on the Lord to deliver on a promise He made me the previous April. The promise? "I want you to prepare yourself to be in a relationship a year from now". This promise was in no way from my own heart, as I was reluctant to move back to the Northwest and was disheartened that there were no single, godly men that I would be compatible with, and besides-I had been single my whole life! Despite these huge doubts I waited to see if that was really God's promise for me.
Fast forward eight months to January 20th, 2011 when I met Phillip Grant. My roommate Rachelle was convinced that he was perfect for me, and I was less than thrilled to be"set up" without a man's knowledge or my consent. However, as I took a step of faith, despite much fear, I began to get to know Phillip and quickly got involved with his ministry. In the weeks, and months that followed, I prayed more intently and specifically than ever before. The Lord asked me to trust Him, and to be Phillip's friend, which I did ever so cautiously and all the while pondering in my heart if this man could be the fulfillment of God's promise.
Those months were filled with pain of risk, and not knowing what to expect. I initiated two "define the relationship" conversations with Phillip out of a desire to know where we stood (with much trembling of voice and hands, and sometimes tears; each conversation went better than I expected, but yielded few answers to my many questions. So many times I wanted to run away from this "thing" that was happening between us. I just wanted Phillip to make a decision about our relationship, I didn't care what the decision was, as long as I just knew where we stood. My heart was starting go beyond just feelings of friendship and getting my heart broken terrified me.
However, I knew that the Lord was in control, He wasn't shutting any doors, I had prayed over and over again, "Lord if this is not Your will, if this is not the man that I am going to marry, please shut the door. I want Your will more than my own". I quickly found that these were some of the most painful prayers I had ever spoken, requiring the deepest level of trust and surrender that I had ever experienced. Little did I know, that this was just the beginning of the "birthing pains" that I would experience in our growing love.
(to be continued....)
~Casey~
No comments:
Post a Comment